I had my MIP (Management-in-practice... another term for summer project) presentation today. I had been dreading this moment for the past few months and it has come and gone. The other day I had requested my groupies to assemble in the canteen to celebrate my B'day. I got dirty looks and A even refused to come. They thought I was treating them in the canteen (not a bad idea). I just wanted to share the brownies Mom prepared for them. Anyway, we gathered in class and started hogging. My other batchmates smelled the food from miles away and rushed to get their hands on some. But my groupies were too smart for them... they finished it all in one go. I have been getting dirty looks since then. A, A and I had our share in the hostel itself. I had to literally hide one piece for H (not that he deserved it... but I am nice).
Hostelites have a different set of table manners altogether (if they can be called that). I have been in a hostel all my life.... so I am fast when it comes to food. Grabbing, snatching etc are second nature to me... actually, to any hostelite. This is how it would go with Mom when I was in the boarding:
Mom: Guddu, do you want biscuits to take to the hostel?
Me (like an obedient daughter): Yes Mommy
Mom: and cakes?
Me: Yes Mommy
Mom: and some namkeen?
Me: Yes Mommy
Mom (exasperated): Do you ever turn down food?
Me: Oh!!! Can I do that? Isnt it rude to do that?
Earlier I could eat to my heart's content and not even gain 1 gm, but that has changed in the past 2 yrs. Now I have to watch what I eat...
Manipal is dead right now. Since MIT students are away, all the shops are closed. It is frustrating. I thought I would treat myself to a good movie after the presentation... but the shop was closed... watched Ice Age 2 again.
Yawn!!! Me going to bed. I had to study Stratgic Management but I'll save it for tom morning or better still tom noon. Procrastination is the answer to any problem.

The Devil is back!!!

I am back at Manipal. I have missed TAPMI so much. The train journey was fine. I had company so time flew by and I even got help with my luggage. I don't remember what I had stuffed in my bag. I have the problem of over-packing (if there is a word like that). I don't like running out of anything, so I tend to pack everything I may need for my stay. We shifted to the 2nd floor of the hostel. The juniors are staying below us. My room is spacious and airy and the view is amazing. Unpacking was a pain, but I finally finished it yesterday.
My friends A and A gifted me Shobha De's book "Spouse", considering the fact that I am nowhere close to getting married (I don't even have a bf)... I was touched. Actually, a month back I had a wierd dream about Shobha (I read her books during my summers)... so, it is a perfect gift. Maybe I could use a few tips from the book.
Our Director adressed us in the morning. He talked about "refocus". It was very encouraging. Until I joined TAPMI, culture was something I associated with society... it was something that holds you down... restricts you. But I was wrong. Organizations have culture. At Taj, the culture is very formal. Everyone treats you with respect. Every B-School has a culture. All of us have blend into the TAPMI culture and our hard-work in our respective organizations is proof of that.
I have my presentation this week, so I need to tie up all the loose ends. Report writing can wait.
I am not even missing home... atleast not yet.

Past one year

I am home after a year. Tom I'll leave for Manipal and dont know when I'll be back. A lot has changed. I have changed too. I have gone through a lot, met loads of people, been betrayed and hurt... have gained friends too. It didnt hurt when people I barely knew lied to me and tricked me; but it hurt like hell when my best friend turned indifferent to me. How do people change so much in so little time? I'll never understand that. I am glad I am leaving. After this my life will be so busy, I wont have time for anything else.
I watched Krrish today and it is amazing. It has a touch of Matrix and Spiderman. Kudos to Rakesh Roshan and all the actors in the movie.
Yawn!!! Have to wake up early and finish packing... so, good night!!!

Yesterday I went shopping at A’bad after more than a year, and I was amazed at the change in the city. Nice malls, good roads, good crowd… is the A’bad I had left behind? Is this the place I was bored with? Is this the city I never wanted to return to? is this the place where the people were not cool enough for me?

It feels good to be back. After staying in places like Manipal, Chennai and Bangalore I have realized where I want to spend the next few years of my life. It is in apnu amdavad. Home is where the heart is, and I have left my heart at A’bad.

These days whenever I switch to any news channel, I have to bear Rakhee Sawant with her “Kiss ka Kisa”. One thing is for sure, there is dearth of news. But I do appreciate the fact that there is a medium through which women can speak their mind. I believe that women should not keep shut. If you want to fight the pig you have to get dirty. I know a lot of women who tolerate all the shit they are given. They will never complain because they worry about “reputation”. What about self-respect? Isn’t that above everything else?

My fetish for clothes

I have spent 7 important years of my life in an all-girls convent boarding school. Since there were no men to dominate and belittle us, we did as we pleased. I wasn’t expected to dress like a girl or walk like one or talk like one. I did as I pleased (that’s why I am so stubborn and bone-headed). Most of these years were spent in uniforms… we had school uniform, games uniform, walk uniform, office bearer’s uniform. So, I have never dressed like a girl.
When I joined engineering, this is how it went.

Me: hey, nice tee shirt.
Friend: thanks. See that red blotch?
Me: yeah, looks kinda cool. Where did u buy the tee?
Friend: hehehehe. That’s a ketchup stain. Hey, nice jeans.
Me: thanks; I have been living in them for the past week… literally.
Friend (impressed): wow. I love your dressing sense.

This is a typical scene when I went home.

Me: mom, where are my clothes?
Mom: what clothes?
Me: my jeans. The ones I wore yesterday.
Mom: I have thrown them for wash.
Me (horrified): wash? But they are jeans. You’ll spoil them by washing them.
Mom: but they were dirty and they were all sorts of stains on them.
Me (in tears): mom, it took me 6 months to get those stains on them. You have ruined them.

I had a relative visiting me when I was in engg.

Me: hi. Have you seen the stinking pile of clothes I left on the bed? I was hoping to wash them today… I am tired of locking the room to prevent the smell from spreading.
Masi: oh, is that what the smell is? I thought it was a dead lizard.
Me: oh, the dead lizard. I disposed it in the neighbor’s backyard as a revenge for the dirty looks she gives me every time my guy friends visit.
Masi: umm, I thought the clothes needed ironing. So, I ironed them and put them in the cupboard.
Me (hating the nosy and helpful female): umm, well… thanks. But I never iron my clothes, it doesn’t go with the image and there is no point in stacking them in the cupboard… eventually I have to remove them. I might as well leave them outside, it is more convenient.

So, you can imagine my plight when I joined Taj for my summer training. I had to spend a week during October and get an idea about the functioning of the organization. On the very first day, the manager blasted me because I was wearing, in his words, “slacks (my expensive wills lifestyle trousers) and a shirt”. I was expected to dress modestly in a saree. That one week I managed in 2 sarees (I tend to over pack for such contingencies), which were tied, up my friend Dee who turned up early to work to help me with it. I went back to Taj in April loaded with 6 sarees (one for each day).
My conversation with Dee before leaving for Chennai.
Dee: hi. Packed?
Me: yup. You?
Dee: yeah. (Looking straight at me) and the saree?
Me (overconfidently): oh, I’ll manage. How difficult can it be?
Dee (shooting down my confidence): sure.

Everyday I thought I would try tom, but that tomorrow never arrived and finally I was at Chennai without any saree draping skills. The lady at my PG came to my rescue. But one fine day (actually night), we had an argument. The next morning I did not seek her help. “Hum sar kata sakte hai but sar jhuka sakte nahi” (unless absolutely necessary). And guess what… I managed pretty fine.

At present I am almost an expert (being too modest here) at tying a saree… one more feather in my cap.

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A perfect life

I don’t believe in perfection. I think it is boring, an end. There isn’t scope for more. There is no next stage. Thankfully, I have been gifted with too many imperfections to ever reach that final stage. And yet I am leading a perfect life. The perfect word to describe it is, well, perfect. So, how did I reach it when I have been trying to do otherwise?

Confused? So am I. Let me start again. Have you ever felt like you have it all… love, friendship, money, talent…. Atleast, everything that matters? What I am wondering is, do I have it all or have I stopped focusing on what I don’t have? So, is happiness a choice? Can I be happy whenever I want to? Does it entirely depend on me? Yes. Nobody can make me happy except me. It is too personal to be affected by my external state.

A lot of you probably don’t agree with me, but that is okay. We all have our own philosophies and opinions about everything about the sun. But, do we have an open mind? Are we flexible enough to listen to the other person, to just give it one thought before disagreeing with it? That, my friend, is the real challenge.