Monday, May 29, 2006

I watched Fanaa on 26th May… first day, first show. Let me narrate how I made such a big mistake. I love movies; they are my favorite time pass. I can watch any movie on TV: art, govinda, mithun etc etc. But watching a movie in a theatre is different. For 3 hours, I will be stuck with the same person in the same seat, which; considering the fact that I am a Gemini, is very difficult. So, I watch only good movies in a theatre after reading their reviews and doing a cost-benefit analysis (some benefit of studying in a B-School) and that too only with good company.

I have a friend H. He had been eagerly waiting for the release of Fanaa and so, I gave in. He leads such a sad life that I hate to impose myself on him. We booked the tickets which were home delivered.

I hate missing the ads in the theatre. They are the best part of the movie. So, we reached bright and early. We don’t even wake up that early for work. The movie began. After the first 15 mins, I was ready to puke. I mean, who the hell falls in love and sleeps (maybe this they do) with a guy after just 5 days? And the shayari got to me. What was Rehaan thinking? "She is so pretty; I’ll spend my entire life just looking at her. Thank god, she cannot see me. I look like a buffoon". Sorry, but I am cynical. My heartbreak has just increased this cynicism. And I swear I saw H shed a tear… I hope he was crying out of disappointment and not coz he found it sentimental… but I can’t be sure… Kal ho na ho is one of his fav movies. I walked out 5 mins before the end of the movie coz I got tired of waiting for Shahrukh to die.

Getting back, Zoobin’s parents are ready to get her married to Rehaan. She gets her eyes operated and regains her vision (wait, she cant regain it if she never had it in the first place, but you know what I mean). Her parents are happy, but she gets the news that Rehaan has died due to a blast at Parliament (some terrorist attack) and Zoobin is guilty coz she had sent him to Parliament to fetch Jolly Singh (lets not even get into this). Next scene shows Rehaan fleeing from India. Apparently, he is in love in Zoobin but his purpose in life (don’t ask wat it is… they probably forgot to mention) comes before anything else.

The cops are looking for the terrorists (why is Tabu shown pregnant?). Some organization called IKF ne tabaahi macha li hai. Rehaan has infiltrated into the army to get hold of the trigger to a bomb which can demolish an entire city (I have heard that one before... which movie was it??). He is in the team in charge for getting the trigger safely… poisons the other dudes and jumps off the helicopter…. Cops chase him... bullets hit him.

And this scene is good: he knocks at a door which is opened by Kajol. She screams; “Rehaan”. And Rehaan is shocked that she recognized him, but she had named her son after him… people, whatever happened to condoms and pills? I mean, they look middle-aged in the movie. How dumb are we supposed to be!!!

She takes him in, nurses him. He realizes Rehaan is his son. She is living with her dad. There is a storm and he cannot leave (how typical!!!). Somehow, she senses this guy is Rehaan and he confesses. Everything is hunky-dory till his pic is spilled in on TVs everywhere. Dad suspects him and takes him to his friend’s house to shoot him. But in the kheecha-kheechi, dad slips off the cliff. Rehaan kills dad’s friend too.

Now, the tackiest scene of all: Zoobin is filling water and sees her dad's dead body floating under the ice. She asks Rehaan about dad and he says that he is staying over with his friend. Zoobin flees the house with her son and informs the cops through the radio. Rehaan follows her and asks her to return the trigger. He just wants to give it to the terrorists and then they can live happily ever after.

He snatches the trigger; Zoobin follows him and shoots him. The cops arrive in time (for once) and kill the other bad guys.

Watch it at your risk and if you like it, plz plz stay at least 22 yards away from me. But yeah, I laughed throughout the second half…. “Sorry, lady sitting on my right, for the weird expressions and antics and giggling and pretence of killing myself”

But the songs are good... my fav is Dekho Na....